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Jun 4, 2007 14:17:07 GMT
Post by unicorn07 on Jun 4, 2007 14:17:07 GMT
Yesterday I got the worst call, apparently my great-grandmother had several mini strokes, she's back at the nurseing home...
..but nobody expects her too live that long, they think that she won't be around much longer.
I'm so upset, I don't even want to know when she dies because its just horrible, I know everyone dies, but she's my great grandmother I always seen her as the person who'd live forever.
Then I feel selfish that I want her to stay around because she's 101 years old, not many people get any family member too live that long.
Then I start thinking I'm asking too much because she hasn't been herself these last several years, I still remember her back in her "youth" when she'd make us kolaches and call me babicka(grandmother).
I just don't know what to think or do...I've never experenced death, known people who've passed but didn't know them well enough to be effected.
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Robynn
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Jun 4, 2007 15:24:53 GMT
Post by Robynn on Jun 4, 2007 15:24:53 GMT
the first one is the most difficult. I experienced my first at age 6 when my grandmother died of an anyrism in her sleep (I know I spelled that wrong, but a blood vessel in her brain burst, and it killed her instantly). I lost my last grandparent a little over a year and a half ago. I never knew any of my great grand parents, although, my daughter's lost theirs when my grandmother died a year and a half ago. 3 year before that was my grandfather. They were close to them. You will get over it, and realize that they are whole again, and themselves where they are, and much happier than existing here as an old person, unable to do the things that really bring joy to them (it was gardening for my grandmother, and building things for my grandfather). Our prayers are with you, as she goes from this life to the next.....
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Jun 4, 2007 16:21:44 GMT
Post by unicorn07 on Jun 4, 2007 16:21:44 GMT
The bit about them being whole and themselves is the only thing that keeps me "okay" with her leaving this world, because she's outlived two of her kids and a husband and boyfriend, and I know most parents think/say the parent is suppose to leave this world before there kid not the other way around.
Thanks for your prayers, I hope that when she does go its quick and painless.
I'm *thinking* she won't pass this month, I only say this because everytime are family starts going "shes going to leave us soon" she is here for another year...she just keeps going.
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Robynn
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Jun 7, 2007 16:56:54 GMT
Post by Robynn on Jun 7, 2007 16:56:54 GMT
My grandfather lived for many, many years after his initial stroke, having several hundred more mini strokes until he finally got too weak to handle them. But he was a shell of his former self, and very abusive when he passed. He reverted to his old/younger ways of living.
Here's some info for everyone...it's real, and correct....
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Jun 7, 2007 19:32:50 GMT
Post by stratlady on Jun 7, 2007 19:32:50 GMT
I'm *thinking* she won't pass this month, I only say this because everytime are family starts going "shes going to leave us soon" she is here for another year...she just keeps going. This reminds me of my grand-aunt. When my dad met her, a good 25 years ago, they told him she won't live long. Today, she's still alive and kicking, aside for her memory. ;D So, in short, you never know.
And my prayers will be with you along the way Jess. A lot of what you said in your post reminds me of me, when my grampa was passing away...
And don't feel guilty for feeling like you want your great-grandmother to stay. That's normal, you love her. And I bet that if your great-grandmother knew this (if she had all her memory of course) she'd be happy about this, because she'd understand that you love her.
Have positive thoughts and pray for her Jess. We'll pray for both of you *hug*
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Jun 7, 2007 20:13:41 GMT
Post by unicorn07 on Jun 7, 2007 20:13:41 GMT
Thanks
What you've both said has helped me, thanks so much!
I think I've come to terms if she does pass...I thought about it a lot.
I figure she isn't hundred percent happy the way she is living now, she can't cook and that was her favorite thing.
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Robynn
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Jun 8, 2007 1:16:16 GMT
Post by Robynn on Jun 8, 2007 1:16:16 GMT
If that's all she's lost, then she's lucky. My grandmother lost everything except how to fold napkins and towels with her Alzheimer's, and she was an award winning gardener and cook, and took care of all the little old ladies at her church. She lost her love of life when she forgot how to cook and how to keep plants alive (she had the larget orchid collection outside of a professional greenhouse in the state)....But now, she's in Heaven with her orchids, cooking for all the Angels.
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Jun 8, 2007 4:31:25 GMT
Post by unicorn07 on Jun 8, 2007 4:31:25 GMT
I was using cooking as an example, but for her losing cooking is a huge thing...cooking was a big part of her life, she was always cooking when I seen her for the most part, especially kolaches...oh how I miss her kolaches, nobodies are the same.
I can't imagine dealing with a family member with Alzheimer's that must have been hard.
**By the way Kolaches are a Czech cookie, I advice to try one there delicious!
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Robynn
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Jun 8, 2007 4:58:42 GMT
Post by Robynn on Jun 8, 2007 4:58:42 GMT
it's hard when they start losing thier faculties and turn back into a child, and need the care an anfant does. Most of the time they realize they're a burden, and don't want to be. The gift about Alzheimer's is that they don't know they're sick. It's harder on the family than it is the patient. I mean, they don't understand WHY they can't just go out for a walk any more...because they don't remember that the last time they were lost for hours just walking around the block and needed to be brought back home. So yeah....either way, it's hard to watch the elderly get old. That's why I don't wanna get there.
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Jun 9, 2007 14:11:33 GMT
Post by stratlady on Jun 9, 2007 14:11:33 GMT
^^^Tell me about it. My gramma always try to understand where she is, and why she needs to take these pills and all, but she can't. Now, try to make her understand that she can't understand that anymore. Tis my friend, is hell, 'cuz she won't accept it (not that I blame her).
Oh and yesturday, my gramma got examined by the doctor, and had to do this memory test. Lord behold, she could now do small substraction and remember a few things.
@jess: I am glad you're doing better Jess. If you ever to talk more, you know where around. On a side note, thanks for clearing up what were Kolaches. I though it was some sort of beverage. lol And by the way, it does good. *is hungry*
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